I have a very close friend who has come to understand she cannot have children, after many excruciating attempts.
When we just learned of her last incomplete pregnancy, my husband and I talked about my possibly being a surrogate mother for her. I have had this thought come in my path before, but only in very shallow google searches. Without any more concrete info, I didn't really pursue it and the little I saw intimidated me. This was also when I was in the throws of crap with my mom and thinking of taking a walk seemed intimidating. haha. ANYway.
I brought it up to my friend, and in doing so, learned that her sister and one of her coworkers also offered to carry for her, which warmed my heart. She's considering adoption and, even so, her husband didn't seem all that on board with surrogacy.
In that day though, it actually got me kind of excited? just thinking about it.
I had an extremely wonderful and fun pregnancy with my son. Birth went pretty well too. I felt empowered, beautiful, and enjoyed all the nuances of the pregnancy. But also, just that experience of imagining my friend getting her baby after all this time was really getting me emotional. It feels a little disconnected trying to consider doing this for a stranger, but surely the lot of them would be in such a similar state of wanting a child so badly as well, right?
We're still in research stage here, but I was also wondering what you guys thought of surrogacy. What are the spiritual implications of carrying someone else's child. Or, more so, bringing a new child into the world for another family. What if it wasn't in their "lesson plan" so to speak, to have a child? Am I playing God for them? Would I just be a transport for a baby or would some of me be set into the baby even if it's just a gestational pregnancy? Apparently a lot of places in the world feel it's akin to selling a child, in that the mother gets paid for doing this. (The little research I've seen has many questions making sure that the mother is well financially and not on any government assistance. That they have insurance and are not in such a dire state to just get money any way they can. This is apparently not the case in places like India, where many childless couples go to do it all there, since it's cheaper. But it leads way to exploitation of the surrogate mothers.)
I feel like I might be a good match for being a surrogate mother because of my focus on my health, and therefore the health of the child. I also have a strong desire to encourage life (in the face of, for example, suicide) but never felt strong enough to "fight the good fight" as one would say, in helping suicidal people. It would also be providing children to people who ache to have one of their own.
A small extra which involves part of the process, I would have to potentially (more than likely) take hormonal supplements to sync my cycle up with the mother to be's. It would be a lot of doctor/medical stuff and, while I'm starting to feel less odd about that, it still raises concerns for me. It feels a bit unnatural a process. But... is it worth it?
I'd like to hear your thoughts. Thanks, guys.
When we just learned of her last incomplete pregnancy, my husband and I talked about my possibly being a surrogate mother for her. I have had this thought come in my path before, but only in very shallow google searches. Without any more concrete info, I didn't really pursue it and the little I saw intimidated me. This was also when I was in the throws of crap with my mom and thinking of taking a walk seemed intimidating. haha. ANYway.
I brought it up to my friend, and in doing so, learned that her sister and one of her coworkers also offered to carry for her, which warmed my heart. She's considering adoption and, even so, her husband didn't seem all that on board with surrogacy.
In that day though, it actually got me kind of excited? just thinking about it.
I had an extremely wonderful and fun pregnancy with my son. Birth went pretty well too. I felt empowered, beautiful, and enjoyed all the nuances of the pregnancy. But also, just that experience of imagining my friend getting her baby after all this time was really getting me emotional. It feels a little disconnected trying to consider doing this for a stranger, but surely the lot of them would be in such a similar state of wanting a child so badly as well, right?
We're still in research stage here, but I was also wondering what you guys thought of surrogacy. What are the spiritual implications of carrying someone else's child. Or, more so, bringing a new child into the world for another family. What if it wasn't in their "lesson plan" so to speak, to have a child? Am I playing God for them? Would I just be a transport for a baby or would some of me be set into the baby even if it's just a gestational pregnancy? Apparently a lot of places in the world feel it's akin to selling a child, in that the mother gets paid for doing this. (The little research I've seen has many questions making sure that the mother is well financially and not on any government assistance. That they have insurance and are not in such a dire state to just get money any way they can. This is apparently not the case in places like India, where many childless couples go to do it all there, since it's cheaper. But it leads way to exploitation of the surrogate mothers.)
I feel like I might be a good match for being a surrogate mother because of my focus on my health, and therefore the health of the child. I also have a strong desire to encourage life (in the face of, for example, suicide) but never felt strong enough to "fight the good fight" as one would say, in helping suicidal people. It would also be providing children to people who ache to have one of their own.
A small extra which involves part of the process, I would have to potentially (more than likely) take hormonal supplements to sync my cycle up with the mother to be's. It would be a lot of doctor/medical stuff and, while I'm starting to feel less odd about that, it still raises concerns for me. It feels a bit unnatural a process. But... is it worth it?
I'd like to hear your thoughts. Thanks, guys.