Jealousy Envy In Relationships (1 Viewer)

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Solnarehyah

Involved Wayfarer
Aug 3, 2016
137
396
Morton, Pennsylvania
It's really best to work with a group and a teacher for a number of reasons. It takes a lot of dedication and daily exercises to properly do the work, but I can write out a process to use, it's just much more effective to have something to attend to, like a group setting, where you check in, talk over things, do a few exercises in the group, and be reminded of the focus you are trying to achieve, in this case, to stop ego controlling all aspects of you.

Similar to astral projection work, it's important to have a regular pattern of focusing on the actual goal you are wanting to achieve. So for example, a person who does daily exercises to achieve a conscious split from their physical into their astral body should also read books and material on the same subject each day, as this can greatly help the mind shift to achieving the goal.

There is also no point in just focusing on one ego element, and leaving another, as it's important to go all the way here and keep identifying all of them. Therefore if a person has issues with eliminating ego, or thinking this doesn't make sense, it is not going to work. While I was taught how to eliminate it completely, I felt that was not appropriate, and that it was just effective to leave it be, and just not let it be part of the equation while not destroying it; but this may just be me having a block around the method of completely removing it, where that may actually be beneficial, however, for me, I don't need to do that.

There are of course many paths to enlightenment, but this is a very advanced method and like I mentioned in my article on ego, it's difficult to move beyond what has been with a person over so many lifetimes, and be open to even attempting this.


So this is a memory recall method to help identify the element of ego that comes up. Once a day is enough, but you could perform this action twice a day. What you will find is that if you do it twice a day, it will be easier as you will have less to recall.

Morning or afternoon/evening is past. So get into a relaxed state, similar to how you would prepare for a regular meditation. I always relax my body first, so I go through relaxing each part for a few minutes — this has become a very fast process for me so I don't spend as much time on it like I once did when learning about body relaxation.

Now focus on the events of the previous 24 hours. What you want to do is focus on everything you did since the last meditation session with this activity, but starting off just do the past day.

There are two ways to do this. You can reverse time from where you are, or start time from a day before, and go through each moment. So for example, if you reverse time, start thinking about your interactions since you got into your meditation. Think about how you reacted, and acted, based on what you were doing. Usually a person will be involved with the memory. So for example, you may have been driving in your car somewhere an hour before. Someone cut you off in front, and that may have annoyed you in some way. Think about how you reacted and what emotion came up when that occurred. Recall what you did, in terms of your behavior, after that event, so while you are going backwards here, you can move forwards a bit , and then return to moving backwards through the last day with memory recall.

Think about how that effected your mood and what decisions resulted as a result of that one interaction with the person in the car that cut you off. Now the more you do this, the easier it will be, so did anger or rage come up when you were cut off? What was the emotion and catalyst behind that? The more you see and observe how you react through memory recall, the easier it will be to change your situation in the moment the next time something comes up.

But it's also important to practice meditation methods outside of this ego activity. You need to learn to be in the now as much as possible, as if you are not in the now, you won't have as much control over your ego. If you are stuck in the mind when a situation comes up, that will be a distraction for when you have the opportunity to stop ego reacting or acting out.

So ego work is even more effective if you live life in the now. One technique of being in the now is focusing on the five senses and observing how each sense is noticing the world, but not thinking about it, just using those senses to be in the now. So you could be walking, you could be in the shower, you could be brushing your teeth, you could be sitting at a cafe; what you do hear in that moment? What do you see? What do you smell and taste? What do you feel under your feet or fingers? Don't think, just acknowledge the answer and it becomes a method to be in the now and out of the mind, and this is another very powerful technique, not just for ego work, but for many other aspects of spiritual development. It can even help a lot with conscious astral projection.

Ok, back to the activity.

Keep going back, what happened before driving and being cut off? So you may have been at work. Did you talk to anyone when leaving work? Did a colleague say something that triggered an ego reaction within you? How did you feel in terms of your emotions? Was anything involved such as jealousy? Maybe some pride? As you can see, from not actually having examples of a persons day, it's hard to explain this method in writing, as if a person was talking about their day in a group setting, it would be easier to show how ego pops up in day to day life.

It's also very helpful if you can recall what you were thinking at the time. So this is not just about recalling practical events, but what was on your mind, as what was on your mind in the moment is very helpful to working out how ego took control. It can be really hard to recall what you were thinking about — I found this hard. Some people find it easy. But like I said, the more you do this, the easier it gets.

So moving back through the day, just recall everything possibly, as these events are like gold nuggets. They are perfect examples to show you how your ego plays out in your day to day life, and how so many people are not actually in control of what they do, their ego is.

Something to think about: a person that goes and meditates in a cave for 5 years will not have the opportunities to work on their ego, as they need interaction with other humans, but they may gain other abilities such as conscious astral projection, however, when in the astral and dimensions above, it's crucial to have learnt to control the ego, otherwise the experiences will be filled with tests, trials, temptations, and interference, making it hard to progress using out of body experiences. Our ego is amplified greatly when out of body and in the dream state. It can easily be a block for pregression.

So going back, back in your mind about the day. Perhaps your mobile rang while you were at your desk (these are just examples that have no relation to you, but I am trying to make these common examples) and you were doing something important. The call is from a friend, and you don't want to be rude by ignoring it. What emotion comes up in that moment? How do you react and what do you do. Do you answer the mobile and your friend talks about a new house she juts purchased with her husband, and envy pops into mind? How does this effect you and the rest of your day? Is it a big deal? Or perhaps it's not a big deal but you noticed that you became envious and this is another ego element which can control a persons decisions and life.

So do that for the rest of the day, going back, and you may see so many ego elements pop up and be amazed. Like I said, this gets easier and easier the more it is done and should really be done on a daily basis.

Well I better end it there but this is a powerful way to work with ego.

Thank you for that detailed description Laron. That is absolutely wonderful. I love the insight about someone meditating in a cave as well.
I agree, doing a workshop or having a teacher would be more effective and fast paced I guess. That option is not available for me right now.
What's very comforting about this is that I am already doing a lot of this. I do it during my regular meditation and after a certain event that triggers me as soon as I get a chance. I could be more regular and consistent though so this really helps.

I also talk to my ego and various aspects of it, expressing gratitude and asking it to rest and retrieve. I really feel it working when I do that not just energetically but my physical body reacts to it.
 
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Anna

Involved Wayfarer
Aug 1, 2016
112
406
Thanks for an interesting article. I totally agree with you those emotions are very unhealthy for creating healthy relationships. What i find also really unhealthy is the societal norms of how relationships should be in where i think those emotions fill there purpose for us to grow beyond the stereotypes. I recognize what u had dealt with as i had problems with the romantical part for exemple as feeling locked and not free cause of jelaousy. I learned how i didnt want it but i learned more from those emotions when i came to realization i wasnt out for a relationship with all that is normally included so i was not clear to the other person/ gave false expectations plus that i never choose 100 percent, and by those factors i came to realization how i was part of to create those feelings in the other person which was great learning for me to be able to love in a more honest way.
 

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