Still the mind by disarming the Ego
Many of us have been there. We’ve scheduled time and space in our active lives for meditation, only to have the mind and Ego start an incessant rant the moment we close our eyes. Very few of us are immune to it, including myself. The moment we begin to meditate, the Ego begins hurling a list of “urgent” to-do’s, issues and concerns. It often sounds like this:
“How am I going to handle “X” problem?
“I should be doing laundry rather than spending time here.”
“I wonder what John thinks about me.”
“How am I going to pay for “X”?”
“Why does my leg hurt?”
And so on, and so on the Ego goes.
I was once struck with a deep sense of irony because the exact life issue for which I was seeking answers was the same issue the Ego kept chattering about!
So how do we quiet the Ego? To answer this, we first need to understand what the Ego is.
The Ego – What is it?
For many centuries, psychologists, psychiatrists, philosophers and religious leaders have poised this exact question and others: What is the Ego? How can we isolate and identify it? Why does it exist and what is its purpose? How does it impact one’s life?
According to the working definition at Merriam-Webster.com, the ego is defined as: “the opinion that you have about yourself” and “a part of the mind that senses and adapts to the real world”.
But is that all the Ego is, or is it more than that? Is the Ego’s singular and sole purpose to allow us to form opinions about ourselves and our function in this world… or does the Ego also have a soul purpose?
Suppose, for a moment, the Ego has many purposes. What if it not only provides an Ego-based identity (so we can adapt to the world), but also serves as the Darkness within each of us to balance out the Light? What if it serves as the loud internal voice in stark contrast to the still quiet voice of our intuition? What if the Ego’s purpose is not just to help us establish identity, but also affords the “soul purpose” of exposing us to our darkest fears and insecurities so we can grow through that exposure?
Imagine that.
And let’s imagine something more. The Ego has a lot of different personalities. When it’s in check and being managed, it provides a sense of Self and Who We Are that allows us to function within society (albeit it a false identity). But the Ego hates being controlled and it abhors mediocrity. Give it a basic and moderate sense of identity, and leave it unchecked, and the Ego quickly becomes Egocentric, where the world is all about “me, me, me” and “I, I, I”. And let the Egocentric continue unchecked and the Ego will quickly leap into Egomania, where everything is “me, me, me” and all insecurities are masked and hidden by a false sense of superiority. It loves control, and loves being the boisterous man behind the curtain in the mind’s Wizard of Oz.
So how do we identify the Ego?
Once a person understands what the Ego is, the next step is knowing when the Ego is speaking versus when thoughts are your own. This can be tricky, because the Ego loves to slide little comments into our thoughts. To help identify it, always be suspect of every thought that contains “I”, “I’m” “me”, “my”, “mine” and “myself”. The Ego is always trying to establish a sense of self and separation from others. It is the Ego that gave birth to the illusion of separateness and it is the Ego that leads us away from Oneness.
The Ego always tries to build a false construct of self-esteem by comparing itself to others and finding ways to declare others inferior to itself. It does this through:
* Trying to establish superiority through appearance, race or social standing.
* Trying to establish superiority through skills, abilities or talents (singing, sports, dance, etc.).
* Trying to establish superiority through wealth, religion or title.
* Trying to establish superiority through education, aptitude or intelligence.
As a general rule, whenever we encounter thoughts that compare ourselves to others, the Ego is speaking, and it comes from a place of insecurities and Fear. Love -- which is the Light in each of us -- never makes comparisons. Love sees beyond appearances, social standing, wealth or IQ. Love sees the soul.
So how do we quiet the Ego?
If you commonly have trouble meditating due to a chattering mind, try these steps:
1. The surest way to leave the Ego speechless is through gratitude! Before you try to meditate, take a moment to be grateful for all the blessings in your life: loved ones, family, friends, pets, and all belongings that you are thankful for. When you are grateful, the ego has little response. After all, how can it compare “I” or “me” to the best things in your life?
2. Be sure to include the Ego in your gratitude! I know… it sounds crazy, right? But bear in mind the Ego has helped you. It has provided you with a sense of identity that helped you acquire those loved ones, pets, and all those belongings that bring you comfort. So thank it! You will further disarm the Ego and leave it stunned.
3. Negotiate with the Ego. Again, I know it sounds crazy, but think of it this way: the Ego’s job has always been to give you a sense of identity… of “Who You Are”. Doing so is part of its purpose. That’s its job! For this exact reason, meditation makes the Ego feel threatened, fearing it may be “out of a job” if you begin relying on guidance from a Higher Source rather than just following the advice the Ego has always provided you. So talk to it! Help the Ego understand that Higher Guidance isn’t a replacement for the Ego, because you can’t meditate 24/7 and you still need the Ego. Let the Ego understand that any knowledge you receive during meditation will not only benefit you, but will also benefit it through making you be a better you.
Quieting the mind and ego can sometimes be a challenge for any of us, but apply these practices and you’ll likely still the mind by disarming the Ego.
Blessings and Love
Many of us have been there. We’ve scheduled time and space in our active lives for meditation, only to have the mind and Ego start an incessant rant the moment we close our eyes. Very few of us are immune to it, including myself. The moment we begin to meditate, the Ego begins hurling a list of “urgent” to-do’s, issues and concerns. It often sounds like this:
“How am I going to handle “X” problem?
“I should be doing laundry rather than spending time here.”
“I wonder what John thinks about me.”
“How am I going to pay for “X”?”
“Why does my leg hurt?”
And so on, and so on the Ego goes.
I was once struck with a deep sense of irony because the exact life issue for which I was seeking answers was the same issue the Ego kept chattering about!
So how do we quiet the Ego? To answer this, we first need to understand what the Ego is.
The Ego – What is it?
For many centuries, psychologists, psychiatrists, philosophers and religious leaders have poised this exact question and others: What is the Ego? How can we isolate and identify it? Why does it exist and what is its purpose? How does it impact one’s life?
According to the working definition at Merriam-Webster.com, the ego is defined as: “the opinion that you have about yourself” and “a part of the mind that senses and adapts to the real world”.
But is that all the Ego is, or is it more than that? Is the Ego’s singular and sole purpose to allow us to form opinions about ourselves and our function in this world… or does the Ego also have a soul purpose?
Suppose, for a moment, the Ego has many purposes. What if it not only provides an Ego-based identity (so we can adapt to the world), but also serves as the Darkness within each of us to balance out the Light? What if it serves as the loud internal voice in stark contrast to the still quiet voice of our intuition? What if the Ego’s purpose is not just to help us establish identity, but also affords the “soul purpose” of exposing us to our darkest fears and insecurities so we can grow through that exposure?
Imagine that.
And let’s imagine something more. The Ego has a lot of different personalities. When it’s in check and being managed, it provides a sense of Self and Who We Are that allows us to function within society (albeit it a false identity). But the Ego hates being controlled and it abhors mediocrity. Give it a basic and moderate sense of identity, and leave it unchecked, and the Ego quickly becomes Egocentric, where the world is all about “me, me, me” and “I, I, I”. And let the Egocentric continue unchecked and the Ego will quickly leap into Egomania, where everything is “me, me, me” and all insecurities are masked and hidden by a false sense of superiority. It loves control, and loves being the boisterous man behind the curtain in the mind’s Wizard of Oz.
So how do we identify the Ego?
Once a person understands what the Ego is, the next step is knowing when the Ego is speaking versus when thoughts are your own. This can be tricky, because the Ego loves to slide little comments into our thoughts. To help identify it, always be suspect of every thought that contains “I”, “I’m” “me”, “my”, “mine” and “myself”. The Ego is always trying to establish a sense of self and separation from others. It is the Ego that gave birth to the illusion of separateness and it is the Ego that leads us away from Oneness.
The Ego always tries to build a false construct of self-esteem by comparing itself to others and finding ways to declare others inferior to itself. It does this through:
* Trying to establish superiority through appearance, race or social standing.
* Trying to establish superiority through skills, abilities or talents (singing, sports, dance, etc.).
* Trying to establish superiority through wealth, religion or title.
* Trying to establish superiority through education, aptitude or intelligence.
As a general rule, whenever we encounter thoughts that compare ourselves to others, the Ego is speaking, and it comes from a place of insecurities and Fear. Love -- which is the Light in each of us -- never makes comparisons. Love sees beyond appearances, social standing, wealth or IQ. Love sees the soul.
So how do we quiet the Ego?
If you commonly have trouble meditating due to a chattering mind, try these steps:
1. The surest way to leave the Ego speechless is through gratitude! Before you try to meditate, take a moment to be grateful for all the blessings in your life: loved ones, family, friends, pets, and all belongings that you are thankful for. When you are grateful, the ego has little response. After all, how can it compare “I” or “me” to the best things in your life?
2. Be sure to include the Ego in your gratitude! I know… it sounds crazy, right? But bear in mind the Ego has helped you. It has provided you with a sense of identity that helped you acquire those loved ones, pets, and all those belongings that bring you comfort. So thank it! You will further disarm the Ego and leave it stunned.
3. Negotiate with the Ego. Again, I know it sounds crazy, but think of it this way: the Ego’s job has always been to give you a sense of identity… of “Who You Are”. Doing so is part of its purpose. That’s its job! For this exact reason, meditation makes the Ego feel threatened, fearing it may be “out of a job” if you begin relying on guidance from a Higher Source rather than just following the advice the Ego has always provided you. So talk to it! Help the Ego understand that Higher Guidance isn’t a replacement for the Ego, because you can’t meditate 24/7 and you still need the Ego. Let the Ego understand that any knowledge you receive during meditation will not only benefit you, but will also benefit it through making you be a better you.
Quieting the mind and ego can sometimes be a challenge for any of us, but apply these practices and you’ll likely still the mind by disarming the Ego.
Blessings and Love
